When I started out coaching, I was helping men with their dating lives. I had a bunch of advice and ideas for how they should go about meeting a partner, and I would give this advice and these ideas to them, and I thought that's what coaching was. And that IS part of what coaching is. Sometimes, coaching is giving someone an idea for how to proceed on a path that you have already gone down. Very useful.

But there's a deeper layer to coaching. Because the most important thing you can do in your life is to walk your own path. Go on the journey of growth, discovery, and contribution, that is unique to you in all the world. I call this "Walking the Magic Road."

And no one can lead the way for you there. That's the point. It's your road, you are the one who has to walk it.

We were each born to walk our road. But along the way, you can get confused, lost, or stuck. Sometimes, you pitch camp on the side of the road, and stay there for a long time, slowly forgetting where you came from and where you're going, just trying to make yourself as comfortable as possible in what was supposed to be a temporary stop.

The deepest coaching is helping you remember who you were, who you are, and who you are here to become, and supporting you in clearing the obstacles that have stopped you, so that you can become, in the world, who in your heart you know yourself to be.

How does it work?

CHANGE

Coaching begins with identifying the precious change you want to make in your life. Sometimes it looks like an external change (a new job, a relationship), sometimes an internal change (relief from anxiety, a new sense of confidence). But the truth is, it's always both. The things that call you, also call you to become the version of you that can have those things.

ACTION

Once we've identified the change, next we identify the action you have to take to move towards it. There is no transformation without action. All the insights, reframes, ecstatic states, and catharsis are ultimately empty if they're not accompanied by real action that moves you towards the change you want.

TRANSFORMATION

And this is where the fun really starts. Sometimes, just those first two steps are enough to profoundly change your life. Great!

But more often, once you start moving towards the thing you want, you're greeted by the guardians at the gate; all the reasons you don't already have this precious thing.

This is where we enter the deeper layers of coaching, where we work with the very structure of your experience and identity, to transform who you are into the version of you who can have the thing you're moving towards.

The transformational work I do with people operates on three levels*

MENTAL

Understanding your beliefs about yourself and the world, and finding the fit between what is genuinely true about the world, and the beliefs you will need in order to have the thing you want.

EMOTIONAL

Working with personal energy, your states, feelings, and moods, so that they support the life you want to live and express the person you know yourself to be

SPIRITUAL

Working with consciousness, the ground of being, and the greater field to which we all belong.

Transforming the structure of your experience in these dimensions, together with a clear North Star, and aligned positive action, will change your life, in a way you will really enjoy.

HOLISTIC PRACTICE

Finally, your daily habits and practices can support this transformation, or equally, they can work against it. My own experience of coaching, being coached, and working on my own development, is that daily personal practice and habits are the highest leverage thing you can do to grow and transform your life. But don't worry, I'm not going to make you do a three hour morning routine every day (unless you want it). What works in this area differs wildly from person to person, and discovering the perfect balance of structure and flexibility that works for your life is part of the work we'll do together.

If you’re ready to find out what this is like in practice, get in touch.